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together.
He’s not really my boyfriend – he’s my fiance. It’s funny…I waver on what I call him. Some days, he is my husband. It depends.
Since we moved to SC, it’s been hard for him to find work. Last week, he got a job as a waiter at a fancy-schmancy French place in town. He’s been working really hard…harder than he has in a long time…and it’s been really great to see him happy because he’s doing something, meeting people, and feeling like he has a purpose. When he’s not playing the part of waiter, he is looking for a job in media sales.
Charleston is a hard place to find a job. The economy and the fear in the world has made it even tougher to find one. I am so proud of my Bernhardt for not giving up, for working hard at everything he does, and for moving here with me with an open mind…just because I wanted to live in a place where the air smells like magic.
When I shut my eyes today, all I can think about is Bernhardt and how happy I am…how he’s always trying for us…how we’re better people because of each other. I feel lucky. I feel…like I just may have to go to his little restaurant and grab me a glass of wine and a song! I’ve been coming home to him so often that now when I don’t, I just want to give him a hug! Sure, it’s nice to get to come home and just read or watch bullcrap tv…you know…invest in alone time because every human needs it…
but man, oh man…it’s nice to miss my man.
Is it possible?
I was talking to a friend over G-chat and I said, “I hat/love my job”.
Ahhhhh, HAT love. I wish it were “hat love” and not really “hate/love”. Here I am with a fancy M.Ed. sitting in my classroom wondering if I have done the right thing. 
Sometimes standing in front of a group of high school students can be the saddest, most lonely thing in the world.
And then other times when they make me mixed cd’s or tell me I remind them of Margie from “Fargo”…it seems worth the nightmares I have about teaching school naked.
When you are in love, you should take many bike rides together.
Even if you get a little sassy with each other about what route to take and where to get a snack, there’s always a park with a water fountain just begging you to fill your mouth with water and spit it on the person you are with…
meaning your fiance.
I have been student teaching for ten weeks now. Today is my last real day of teaching, and when I got to my desk this morning I found this note from one of my students:
“I’ll miss you.
You are great.
You’ll be a great teacher.
Sincerely,
Lauren”
Wow. That note made me feel…so good and sad all at once. It’s amazing how it feels to teach a class. Leaving these students is making me feel very odd – when I first met them, they scared me to death. Now I feel like I want to make sure they will be ok in their lives…I mean, they live in NORTHBROOK, I’m sure they’ll be fine:). But I’m sure I will find myself thinking of them the day before my summers start, wondering if they are having a nice time in high school…wondering if their lives turned out as they planned. I think about my teachers of the past and wonder how they do the summer break-away…most probably do so with relief. But when you’re in a room with the same group day after day learning lessons together and having good and bad days together…it shapes things more than I ever realized it could.
